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Be vulnerable

I was the kid who cried on the first day of Kindergarten. I was the kid who threw up on the first day of high school (true story), and I was the kid who called my mom every day during my first week of college. Aside from making myself sound completely pathetic and like someone who needs to reign in her feelings, I’m here to tell you transitions are hard.

I know “change is the only constant,” and we should be able to “adapt to new situations” and all that, but in the moment when you’re feeling alone in a place you’ve never been, those fortune cookie clichés are the last things that’ll provide comfort.

This past semester, I did something I never thought I would be able to do: I went across the world (or pond) by myself. I spent a semester in London with complete strangers for four months, and it was easily the best decision I’ve ever made.

Seriously, five or 10 years ago, this was a move no one thought I would make. My transition into high school was hard, but despite the braces and side bangs, I made it through.

Heading into college, I was afraid I wouldn’t make friends and I’d want to go home on the weekends. Then I blinked, and Bradley became my new home.

How many times in your life are you going to be able to drop everything and go across the world? For some people, the answer to that question is never. But I was lucky, and my answer was now. I took advantage of a once in a lifetime adventure and went to live in London.

Sometimes all it takes is a nervous introduction in the airport the day of departure to realize “this is it”.

It was my ability to be vulnerable with people from the start that helped me realize being nervous in a situation like this was completely normal. In fact, if there were students who weren’t a little nervous, they were probably in the minority, not me. From there, I lived out my “Lizzie McGuire” and “Cheetah Girls” fantasies. I planned weekend getaways, ate food I couldn’t pronounce and walked into the unknown.

I know no one likes the person that comes back from abroad saying, “they found what they never knew what they were looking for,” and they “grew more in that semester than their whole life,” but as cringy as it is, it’s pretty accurate.

Of course, it was rocky at first, but now I know London like the back of my hand. I guess that’s not too bad for the girl that cried on the first day of Kindergarten.

One Comment

  1. The Haberdasher The Haberdasher January 28, 2018

    This is an article that should be read by everyone and anyone whose hesitant about walking to the edge and peering over the side. Most times it’s a gorgeous view. What a great testimony to risk taking and being OK enough with yourself to expose it to others. Well done!

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