As I continue to inch closer to the 22nd anniversary of my birth, I’ve come to the realization that as a teenager, I was different than most of my peers. Not “different” as in I picked my nose and ate my boogers every now and then, but different in the sense that I didn’t really seem to adhere to a certain social caste or classification.
I was never athletic enough to be a “jock,” or smart enough to be considered a “nerd” or even independent enough to be a “loner.” I always seemed to be perfectly aligned in the middle, and I interacted with peers who associated themselves with all of those groups. Basically, I got along with my classmates, but I never really “fit in” anywhere.
To be honest, it was comforting to not have to worry about cliques in high school. Our society puts a lot of pressure on adhering to a certain lifestyle or mindset all in the sake of belonging, and it seems that pressure has reached a critical mass.
Although there’s nothing inherently wrong with connecting with a like-minded group of people, sometimes the basic need to fit in can push people to hide who they truly are and turn into somebody they’re not, all in the sake of becoming “a part of the gang.”
Recently, I read a story on “Humans of New York” that really got me thinking about this problem. The subject was a man who was mercilessly picked on and beat up when he was younger, just because he was intelligent, or in his words, “a nerdy kid.”
Eventually, he decided that “being smart and intelligent wasn’t going to protect him,” so he started hanging around negative influences, which eventually landed him in prison due to his involvement as the lookout in a robbery that left two people dead.
The man’s story turned out for the better once he was released 10 years later. Despite the fact that he later got his degree from New York University and became a youth mentor, it still breaks my heart to read of his previous experiences or any stories that are similar.
The fact that he felt he needed to completely change everything about himself not only to fit in, but even more importantly to survive, is something that shouldn’t have to happen to anyone in our society. No one should have to live life believing that they’re a lesser individual just because they’re not a part of the majority.
The thing is, unless you’re a clone or some sort of weird life-model-decoy from the future, no two people on this planet are the same in any way, shape or form. Instead of marginalizing those who come from different backgrounds, cultures or life experiences, we should put more effort toward embracing our differences and coming together as one society that accepts each other and wants to grow together.
I’m aware that we’re a long way off from that ideal becoming a reality, but it can’t hurt to start putting the pieces into place as soon as we can. So let’s get started.
