Other than my job here at The Scout, I work as a Safety Cruiser driver a few days a week. The Cruiser has been providing students and faculty with transport around campus since 2013. Plenty of people use the service each day, and it helps keep campus safer overall.
So today, students of Bradley, I’m going share a few things with you about my (slightly more adventurous) second job.
We see everything
Yeah, we know you went out last night and got into a heated argument. And yes, we know your friend is being a total jerk and dating your ex behind your back. We know a lot of little tidbits and happenings around campus. Don’t take that as a threat – I keep this stuff to myself … mostly.
Yep, we know where that is … probably
If you give us an address, we most likely know where it is. That’s not meant to be passive-aggressive, but part of our training is to know how the streets work and where things are. That’s not to say we know exactly where everything is on and around campus – I know I don’t – but we usually have a good idea.
No, we can’t take you to the bars
We can’t take you down Farmington Road to any of the bars, so please don’t ask; we will lose our jobs. It’s a safety thing, since it’s a bit out of reach for Bradley PD – don’t want any randos getting in the vans, right? And please don’t offer to pay us to take you to the bars because we still won’t do it.
It gets crazy on busy nights
The call logs can get a bit backed up on some nights, particularly Thursday through Saturday. If it takes us a while to get to you, please be patient. The dispatchers are doing their best to give the drivers as many calls as they can handle, and as drivers, we try our best to make our way around to everyone.
Yep, we know you’re drunk
If you’re trying to hide it, we can smell the alcohol as soon as you get in the van. Don’t worry, though; we don’t care, even if you’re underage. This also goes for those individuals that may or may not be under the influence of certain plants (just don’t carry that in the van). Unless you very obviously have alcohol poisoning, it isn’t our job to report you – we just want to make sure you get where you’re going safely.
Be like Spongebob, and make sure you’re ready!
Okay, maybe one more slightly passive-aggressive one. Please, please be ready to go when you call the Safety Cruiser. It might take us a few minutes to get to you (especially on those busy nights I mentioned earlier), but it helps things run smoothly if passengers are ready to go. We can only wait a finite amount of time once we get there, so if you miss it, you’ll have to call again and be shamed by dispatch.
I do it because I like the job (mostly)
On days when things are a bit slow, it’s usually not too bad. We get to listen to the radio while we drive or park and do homework (Netflix is also a decent option if we find a place with an Internet connection). Driving is relaxing to me, so I have no problems roaming around campus jamming out to music on Spotify – plus I get to sing shamelessly if the van is empty.
Being a Safety Cruiser driver isn’t the most exciting job, but I like it. I enjoy making sure students are safe around campus and meeting new people.
There isn’t much to it, but it’s no boring job. Next time you’re too cold to walk back to Geisert or your friend decides to stay at a party, give us a call at (309) 677-2800.
See you on the wild side, folks.
