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The end is near

While I’m not enthralled by the idea of dying at the age of 21, there is evidence abound that the impending culmination of life as we know it could be right around the corner.

With the recent slew of natural disasters (i.e. hurricanes, earthquakes, fires), the predictions of Nostradamus and the insight of the good ol Bible itself, one can formulate a pretty solid doomsday argument.

First of all, the most scientific-based evidence is rooted in Mother Nature rearing her ugly head. The Atlantic Ocean has been unseasonably warm, making it a breeding ground for hurricanes, and record temperatures in the West have spurred wildfires. The legitimacy of climate change is no surprise (to most), and it’s happening at an increasingly rapid rate.

However, many people are not aware that the dormant supervolcano in Yellowstone has also recently stirred up some conversation. According to geological evidence, Yellowstones supervolcano erupts once every 600,000 to 800,000 years and the most recent explosion occurred about 640,000 years ago.

While this fact may reassure some, NASA is not as complacent, and they have started hatching a plan to postpone the eruption of imminent death. With scientists consistently monitoring Yellowstone, why concoct a plan now? They must know something we don’t.

Just like French physician, Nostradamus. Some believe he’s prophetic, others a complete nut job, but theres no denying the relevancy of his name in a rapture debate. His history of predictions include 9/11, Hitlers rise to power, the French Revolution and, some even say, Trump’s presidency.

His most time-sensitive prediction comes in the form of the alarming notion that the final pope will be our current Pope Francis. According to a vague quatrain of Nostradamus and prophecies from Roman Catholic St. Malachy, within Pope Francis lifetime, the Earth will come to an end.

And finally, the most astronomically mind-blowing proof to date. As first discovered on Twitter, the day of the solar eclipse was the Aug. 21, Hurricane Harvey arrived on the 25th and flooding started on the 26th.

When you look up Luke 21:25-26 in the Bible, the passage reads: “And there will be strange signs in the sun, moon and stars. And here on earth the nations will be in turmoil, perplexed by the roaring seas and strange tides. People will be terrified at what they see coming upon the earth, for the powers in the heavens will be shaken.”

Im sure you’re wondering if this is a parody article or if I truly believe James Franco and Seth Rogen’s masterpiece “This is the End” is becoming a reality. While composing this article, I pondered the same thing myself. I was wary of the 2012 hypothesis, but my college education has led me to become more susceptible to conspiracies.

My completely intuitive prediction is the world will end on June 8, 2020. Will I be the next great prophet? Only time will tell.


  1. Ted Ted September 15, 2017

    Dont forget 9-23-2017

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