At the beginning of the school year, I bid farewell to my place in the social networking world by deactivating my Facebook account. And while I knew deleting my page would be accompanied by certain perks, I didn’t expect for it to be so satisfying wholistically. Here are the top reasons why.
10. You can assume you would have been invited to every party
Although my friend count was rather high, I would occasionally find myself not being invited to some pretty sweet events. Of course these instances were likely mistakes that were regretted when parties were lame. But now rather than having to awkwardly answer that I wasn’t invited upon the question of if I’m going to an event, I can simply say I don’t have Facebook but am great friends with the host so would be willing to make an appearance.
9. You don’t have to pretend to keep in touch with high school acquaintances
If you’re like I was, you probably find your wall being attacked by members of your high school graduating class, who forgot you were never friends to begin with. Luckily these semi-strangers realize it would be too awkward to actually call you when they don’t feel like studying for tests, so deactivating your Facebook will mark the end of such relationships.
8. You don’t have to look at embarrassing pictures of yourself
Half the fun of posting embarrassing pictures of someone is seeing how long it takes for the victim to untag. Therefore, not having Facebook will lower the chances of your “friends” exposing you when you’ve had one too many drinks or a bad hair day.
7. You don’t have to feel guilty about not going to your friends’ charity events
Not that I don’t love all of the philanthropists here at Bradley, but invitations to support my greek friends’ Subway nights far outnumbered the amount of excuses I could possibly write on walls for reasons of not going. And although Subway’s new flatbread is pretty good, it’s great to be able to eat it at my own discretion rather than when I feel guilty for not caring about one of a million philanthropies this school so kindly supports.
6. You always have an excuse to forget birthdays
Forgot your buddy’s special day? You can tell this friend that it really sucks you just deleted your Facebook to focus more on homework, because if you hadn’t you would have just written on his or her wall. Having deleted your Facebook will become the new conversation topic and make this person forget you’ve forgotten his or her birthday.
5. Creepy adults and girlfriends’ and boyfriends’ exes can’t stalk you
Upon receiving friend requests from adults at your family church, you should know it’s your time to check out. And who hasn’t stalked the ex of someone they’re interested in? By not being Facebook-accessible, you instill the fear in these exes that you’re just as beautiful as they imagined and also have good taste in music and are full of witty anecdotes to put in your nonexistent “About Me” section. You win.
4. You find other, way cooler Web sites.
This does not mean MySpace. Don’t worry that not having Facebook means you have to work on your soon-due papers. It simply means you can adventure to find new ways to procrastinate. Blogs, news and clothing Web sites – the options are endless! And the special bonus is you can actually talk to your friends about these adventures, because they’ve never heard of them.
3. Wearing the same outfit multiple times is much easier to pull off
Although pictures of you wearing your finest garments may still find their ways to the site, not having a tagged photos section disallows people who aren’t friends with the person who put the album up to view the photos. Therefore, if you’ve got a big party with one group of friends on Friday and then a gathering with a different group on Saturday, you can wear the outfit to both events without having to debate whether to untag.
2. Relationship status
Facebook’s most dramatic section just causes too many issues. Amusingly, Facebook-defining a relationship has become a serious problem for many. Entering an “It’s Complicated” relationship with one of your same-sex friends will not solve your problems, either. If you can’t handle a Facebook relationship, it’s likely the real thing won’t work out anyway.
1. No more drama
Although this Mary J. Blige line may have been sung through some of the above reasons, it’s also deserving of its own section. Conversations about others’ wall-to-walls and news feeds telling you who’s recently become friends at the end of a weekend are probably not mandatory parts of your life. If you’ve ever spent time wondering if someone is denying your friend request because he or she is not on your friend list within 24 hours of asking, you are a victim of Facebook-drama. Luckily, this is curable. And you can laugh at people when they publicly wonder if you unfriended them, and you begin to realize the ridiculous things that occurred in your life when you had a Facebook.
Emily Regenold is a junior journalism major from Cincinnati. She is the Scout news editor.
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