A truly dreadful day is approaching.
Singles Awareness Day aka Valentine’s Day, or as I like to refer to it, VD makes its annual round.
If you’ve read my columns or know me, I’m sure you’ll be able to guess this little tidbit about me – I hate Valentine’s Day.
I spend 364 days of the year working on not showing emotion just so I can spend all my emotions on hating this day.
Am I being dramatic? Maybe a little.
I’m not totally averse to love, and if people would celebrate Valentine’s Day for the right reasons, I might actually be OK with it.
Instead of honoring St. Valentine, this day has turned into a commercial holiday with people spending their money on cards, chocolates and roses to say they love each other.
If people really loved each other, they wouldn’t need to display it on a day everyone else is showcasing their love. They would be showing their significant others how much they appreciate him or her ever day they are together. Valentine’s Day is pretty much pointless in that aspect.
People who truly love each other don’t need society to set aside a date that tells them when to appreciate the person they love.
The people who benefit from VD the most are those that are not in true love.
These are the people who are overly showy with their love.
You know who I mean, that couple that will be grossing you out as they make out in the middle of the quad and grope each other, or that girl you work with who will get a garden delivered to her from her boyfriend.
These are the people who go above and beyond to make sure everyone else knows they’re going above and beyond.
And it makes me a little sick.
Therefore, I’ve created a list of things for single, bitter girls – you know, girls like me – to do on Valentine’s Day.
These range from nice, normal ideas to crazy and over the top.
Still interested? Read on.
Do something for yourself
This seems kind of obvious and fairly simple. Do something for yourself and don’t feel bad about it. Wear sweats all day, get your hair done, get a manicure and pedicure or buy yourself a box of chocolates and eat them. God knows, they are plenty of those at the grocery store.
Bottom line – you don’t need a man to treat you like a princess. Do it yourself because you’ve earned it.
Move on from an ex-boyfriend
Chances are you’ve got an ex-flame out there and typically most people don’t get along too well with that person.
If you’re one of those people then it might feel better to let go of everything associated with him or her.
So grab all of their old belongings and any pictures you have of them and gather them into a pile.
Side note, make sure these belongings aren’t expensive or family heirlooms. I mean, I’m not that vindictive.
But if it really didn’t end well, save them anyways, you could always sell them on eBay.
Next, set the pile on fire and let everything burn to ashes.
This might seem a little irrational and harsh, but in reality it’s cleansing.
You’ve gotten rid of the last physical reminders of them and you’re ready to move on to the next stage of your life … Your life that involves not being dependent on anyone else.
Congratulations.
Inform people through fliers
Journalism appeals to me because I like to inform others about the facts and what is going on in the world.
You can do your share for the community on VD by distributing fliers to the public regarding the rising rates of divorce and sexually transmitted diseases.
I think we all know how most couples plan to end their Valentine’s night.
Why not keep them painfully aware of the consequences before the pain ends up being somewhere else?
Visit a bridal store
I warned you that some of these were crazy, but you could always make a visit to a bridal store on your Valentine’s Day.
For those girls who are hopeless romantics, try on the perfect dress and tell the store clerk all about how your fiance gave you your dream proposal.
Don’t feel bad – if you ever do get proposed to, it probably won’t turn out the way you planned.
What guy is going to able to read your mind and know exactly what you want?
Or if you’re like me, come up with a proposal story that will make the clerk cringe.
Tell her all about how you need this dress as soon as possible because you don’t want your baby bump to show. Don’t forget to add you’re unsure about your maid of honor because she was once engaged to your fiance, before he cheated on her with you, of course.
Good luck to everyone this Valentine’s Day, whether you’re single or taken.
I only ask that you please try to make this day as bearable as possible for the skeptics and the cynics out there. There’s only so much PDA people can stand before they snap.
Annabelle Vang is a sophomore journalism major from Pekin. She is a Scout copy editor.
Direct questions, comments and other responses to avang@mail.bradley.edu.
