Meterologists’ unpredictibility pays off

First, I’d like to start off by saying I’m not a weatherman and I don’t play one on TV, though I certainly have the face for it.

I’ve never taken a class on meteorology and know very little about weather patterns or atmospheric pressure ratings. Heck, I don’t even know what “El Nino” is.

I have all the respect in the world for people who go to college, get a degree and become working meteorologists (there’s my disclaimer, so don’t send me emails telling me what an insensitive jerk I am). But is there a more overrated profession?

These are clearly smart people. They wouldn’t have made it through college if they weren’t.

Yet, how can weathermen consistently be so wrong?

I’m told it’s going to rain and there’s not a cloud in the sky. A snow apocalypse is in the forecast and we only get a couple inches. I’m constantly baffled.

I’ve held deep-seated resentment toward TV weathermen since I was a kid, so maybe I’m a bit biased. Like everyone else growing up, the potential of snow days and a day off from school made me downright giddy.

Anytime the forecast predicted enough snow to potentially cancel school, I turned into the resident meteorologist. I knew how much snow we were supposed to get, when it was supposed to start falling and the chances I wasn’t going to have to drag myself out of bed at 6 a.m.

Time and time again I got my hopes up and time and time again I was let down.

I understand weather is unpredictable, even in today’s society with the abundance of technology available.

But according to the 2009 Bureau of Labor Statistics report, the median yearly salary for a meteorologist is just north of $85,000.

Seriously?

Where do I sign up? I’m clearly on the wrong career path. I’ll be lucky to be making $80,000 a year at any point in my life.

I’d love to have a job where I can be wrong the majority of the time and still get paid close to six figures a year.

I’m not a genius, but I know for a fact I can look at a radar and tell the public there’s a chance for rain tomorrow. And if it doesn’t rain? Well shucks. Guess I was wrong. Damn Mother Nature fooling me again.

It’s a joke.

I don’t even see the point of watching the nightly weather forecast. It’s almost certain to be wrong. My five minutes everyday would be better spent watching paint dry.

But I have to say these meteorologists have got a good gig going. They’re getting paid the big bucks to be educated guessers.

Did I mention I have a face for television? Anyone looking for a TV weatherman? I’m going to be needing a job in nine short months. I may not meet the requirements, but from what I can tell that doesn’t really matter. I can be wrong just like the rest of them.