Dispatch from Instant View Purgatory: Slumber Party Massacre

Services like Netflix and YouTube have made the most recent films readily available to anyone. Can we find anything of value in the muck of b-movies, ambitious failures and exploitative crap-fests? We’re going to find out in Dispatches from Instant View Purgatory.

What’re we watching: “Slumber Party Massacre,” a 1982 horror film that seems like it was probably a comedy at one point before taking an insanely bizarre turn

What does it look like: Mix one part early ‘80s homemade pornography with two parts of the dumbest horror movie you’ve ever seen. Simmer.

What’s going on: A bunch of sexually active girls decide to have a slumber party on the very same night that a weed wacker wielding mad man has escaped from jail. Their pervy boyfriends happen to show up at the house. Can you possibly guess what happens next?

Why haven’t we heard of this: This is a “Halloween” knock-off if I’ve ever seen one. It probably was rented a lot at Family Video for the insane amount of nudity but it’s mostly fallen through the cracks since then.

What works: Does the phrase “insane amount of nudity” mean anything to you?

What doesn’t: Does the phrase “weed wacker wielding mad man” mean anything to you?

Skip to: For the first half hour or so, you can pretty much make random five minute jumps and see plenty of nudity. After that, stay tuned for the killer shoving an electric drill through a pizza man’s eye.

The Verdict:  “Slumber Party Massacre” belongs in the weird camp of ‘80s films that existed solely to be rented by 13 year old boys looking for some light scares/porn. It doesn’t really work as either, but it’s a decently goofy, fairly fun, occasionally watchable ride.

What’s coming up next: Our quest to find the dumbest romantic comedy premise may finally end when we watch “Chick Magnet.”