“Cute” and “cuddly” aren’t normally words used to describe a turnip, let alone one that doesn’t pay their taxes.
In the short, 2D-style game Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion, developed by Snoozy Kazoo and published by Graffiti Games, you play as Turnip Boy, a simple young turnip who has avoided paying taxes on his greenhouse. Tax evasion is only one crime on Turnip Boy’s long list of offenses, most of which the player assists with: petty theft, murder, trespassing, disorderly conduct and many more.
After being evicted from his home by Mayor Onion, Turnip Boy must collect several items from all over the map to get his house back. But everything is not what it seems, as Mayor Onion has a diabolical plan in the works and it’s up to our tax-evading protagonist to stop him.
There are a series of dungeons or caves spread out throughout the game’s map. Four contain the items required for Mayor Onion, and the rest are either for side quests from other adorable fruits and veggies or remain blocked until the game is beaten.
One obstacle to tackle is a classic red barn, and the player travels through the rooms in search of the pig terrorizing the construction workers. That pig happens to be the first boss, who charges the player as an attack and then knocks itself out for a few seconds when it crashes into a wall.
Once a player realizes the attacks are the same, it’s easy to beat the boss in under a minute, which becomes a common trend amongst the bosses and causes the game to lose some of its entertainment value.
The bosses are predictable; they either have one attack or three used in a set pattern. Whether it’s a spinning Apple Cat or a mutated radioactive deer, the bosses won’t be much trouble, but it doesn’t add much to the gameplay, either — well, other than advancing the Mayor Onion plot.
It’s a constant back-and-forth battle, either to complete a side quest or to find all the documents to rip up (this unlocks a secret ending). Players get bored when they must go from one place to another and back to where they started, only to realize they need to go back to the second place. It’s exhausting and tedious, so many players may put the game down and play something else.
Where Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion thrives is in its story and world-building. For such a short game, only running a couple of hours long, Graffiti Games packed in two major plotlines that don’t connect, but still makes sense given the universe the developers created.
Through a series of documents scattered around the world, the player discovers that Turnip Boy is living in a post-apocalyptic world. Nuclear war destroyed the world humans knew and from the rubble and ash came the humanized vegetables and fruits Turnip Boy meets on his journey. The documents confirm any suspicions of human survivors by having the player fight a mutated human, Liz, who had diary entries as part of the reading material.
Along with the post-apocalypse storyline, Turnip Boy discovers his family heritage as part of the Turnipchino mafia family, the only surviving member. Mayor Onion wants his revenge against Don Turnipchino, and taking over the greenhouse to access the mafia base underneath was the ultimate goal.
Behind his black, soulless eyes, Turnip Boy has a unique, albeit goofy, story to tell. From the seriousness of nuclear warfare to the hilarious Turnipchino mafia family, Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion has humor and crime. Despite its brief playtime, it can be played in one sitting if you want a break from the real world for a little bit.
With current situations in the world, this game leaves you with lingering thoughts on nuclear powers and the aftermath.
