People always say to hold your loved ones close, because you never know when they’ll be gone.
I’ve been no stranger to mourning, and at every funeral I attended, I always thought I would get stronger emotionally. But it didn’t take long to realize that wasn’t true.
I can still remember when I was seven, and I went to my Grandma Wagner’s service. As her only grandson, I had a special bond with her, so when I got to the church, I was overcome with grief knowing that she was no longer with us.
Six years later, my Aunt Barb was put in hospice care, and I visited her every day until she went to be with God. I couldn’t help but burst into tears when I found out, remembering all the great memories I had with her.
Just this year, my great-aunt Peaches also left this Earth. I have a ton of vivid memories with her, from visiting her in Florida for my fifth birthday to seeing her again when she moved back to Illinois.
But the one that hit me hardest happened seven months before I arrived at Bradley. On January 13, 2023, I was visiting my Grandpa Clark, who had been battling leukemia for two years. It was getting late, so my parents and I said our goodbyes before driving back home.
Before I went to bed, my mom called me into her room. She informed me that she received a text from Grandma, who told her that Grandpa passed away peacefully not long after we left. It was almost like he held on so he could say one final goodbye.
After hearing this news, I was inconsolable. Grandpa was someone I looked up to from childhood. He helped me with school projects, attended my school concerts and made me laugh with his grumpy personality and fun-natured smile.
I had the honor of being one of his pallbearers at the funeral, but as we carried his coffin to the cemetery, it hit me. He wouldn’t get to see me perform at my final high school musical; he wouldn’t get to see me graduate from high school and he wouldn’t get to see all the cool things I would go on to do at Bradley.
It’s always hard to think about the fact that I’ve lost so many family members in my life. I even shed a couple of tears writing this column.
But one thing always makes me feel better – realizing they are in a better place.
Even though I can’t see them in physical form anymore, they’re all together in heaven now, a place where they’ll live the rest of eternity in peace.
Grandma Wagner, Aunt Barb, Aunt Peaches and Grandpa Clark, I’ll always love you guys. I hope you’re looking down on me and are proud of the man I’ve become.
