Have a life

I explicitly remember freshman year, staring at the list of newspaper dates posted on the door of Sisson 319, thinking about how sad it was

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Post-Parkland dialogues

On Feb.13, intelligence agencies across the nation were working with Congress on the worldwide threat assessment, focusing on lowering foreign terrorism and organized crime. The

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You’ll scream for ‘Scream Queens’

If the bloody sorority sister in the bathtub during the first five minutes of the show didn’t turn you away, the pilot of “Scream Queens” was full of other creepy surprises, sure to leave your jaw dropped and sides aching from too much laughter.

Just like the “Scream” movie franchise, the series proves to be so stupid that it’s funny, something only possible if there is a plethora of well-known A-listers. The rock star cast includes Emma Roberts, Lea Michele, Ariana Grande, Jamie Lee Curtis, Keke Palmer, Abigail Breslin, Nick Jonas, Niecy Nash, Nasim Pedrad, Skyler Samuels, Diego Boneta, Glen Powell and Oliver Hudson.

This horror-comedy will most likely be a disappointment for fans of creator Ryan Murphy’s other series such as, “American Horror Story” or “Glee,” but for people with low expectations like myself, I was pleasantly surprised. The two-hour premiere managed not only to hold my attention, but left me wanting more.

It’s hard to say if it was the plot, already accompanied with plenty of feeble whodunit twists, the absurd one-liners, which went above and beyond merely poking fun at sensitive topics, or witnessing quality actors and actresses dumb down their talent.

I wouldn’t classify “Scream Queens” as scary, but rather, absurdly gruesome. Some of the deaths were as unrealistic as “Final Destination,” but that doesn’t mean they weren’t entertaining.

However, they’re not nearly as entertaining as the bigotry strategically sprinkled throughout the show, which is just asking for a provoked audience.

All you really have to do is hear the names of the pledges ‘Deaf Taylor Swift’, ‘Candle Vlogger’, ‘Predatory Lez’ and ‘Neckbrace’ to understand that making fun of sexuality, physical impairments and mental instability is all fair game.

What do you get when you combine a sorority, a serial killer and stars? A fun, but hopefully one-season hit to get you in the Halloween spirit.

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