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Ten ways to quarantine in the dorms with a roommate you hate

Bradley just started a two-week quarantine, and you just realized how much you hate your new roommate. Have no fear, here are 10 ways to survive your two weeks in quarantine:

#10 Avoid calling them out while angry
If you go off on your roommate while you’re mad at them, you’re going to have to live with that tension for the remainder of quarantine and, potentially, for the remainder of the year. Don’t address conflicts until you’re in the right headspace.

#9 Bond over your shared misery
No one wants to be in quarantine. You’re both in the worst possible situation; try to make the best of it.

#8 Set clear boundaries
You and your roommate are sharing a tiny shoe box of a room, so try reestablishing boundaries that didn’t get covered at the beginning of the year.

#7. Try being more considerate
Try looking at yourself for the problems you’re experiencing. You’re probably not the ideal roommate either, so see if you can make positive changes to make this shared experience easier.

#6. Clear the clutter
If your roommate is a little messy, try cleaning. You might inspire them to work on their side of the room. They have plenty of time to get it together.

#5. If you’re not in class, act like you’re asleep
If you absolutely can’t work things out, try this. Sure, it’s not very practical, but you might as well. Throw your comforter over your head and scroll through TikTok with your headphones in until your next obligation. Odds are, you probably do this most of the time without your comforter anyways.

#4. Communicate with the dead for company
If you don’t get some face-to-face interaction with an entity you actually like, you’re going to go insane. Who knows, maybe Beelzebub is a lot less of a demon than your roommate is. You can make a ouija board using the paper assignments you’ll never get to turn in. Talk about a DIY!

#3 Pretend you don’t exist
Are you real? Is this just a simulation? Time is a social construct.

#2 Try to be friends with your roommate.
Find your mutual interests and pursue them together. Now is the perfect time to establish camaraderie.

#1 Murder them
You have two weeks to hide the body and come up with an alibi.

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