Press "Enter" to skip to content

The Taken

Another Valentine’s Day rolls around, and yet again, I’ll be spending it alone. Everywhere I go, un-singles surround me like The Plague. They’re what I like to call “The Taken.”

The Taken linger in the Valentine’s Day aisle, looking for the perfect card and candy to give to their loved ones, while I’m just trying to make my way past them to get a new toothbrush.

The Taken smile shyly at their phone screens when they check them the morning of the big day, while I hit snooze on my alarm for the fifth time.

The Taken cut me off in traffic rushing it to see the dreamy romantic comedy they’ve waited all week for, while I’m just trying to make it to Redbox before all the best cry-it-out movies are gone.

But I can’t let The Taken bring me down this Valentine’s Day, and if you feel the way I do, you can’t either. Even though they’re extra happy and excited and feeling especially loved, you only have to endure this one day of sadness. All of your days will seem better in comparison after the dreaded annual love-fest.

Plus, being single means not having to impress anyone or pick out a gift that might go unappreciated. The Taken’s hearts may be fuller, but your wallet is fatter, and that’s what really counts.

But this could be our year. Maybe we’ll be shoving past The Taken at Walmart and go to grab a new toothbrush at the same time as another unlucky soul. From there, fate will take its course, and we will soon join The Taken.

Or maybe not.

Either way, the loathsome holiday is only 24 hours long. So stock up on snacks and sob-worthy movies early, grab a loveable pet and cuddle up with yourself this Valentine’s Day.

And remember, it really isn’t all that bad – maybe someday you’ll be The Taken, too.

Copyright © 2023, The Scout, Bradley University. All rights reserved.
The Scout is published by members of the student body of Bradley University. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of the University.