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Column: A true triple decker sandwich

When people change the course of history, they rarely know they are doing it.

That was not the case for me when I created my triple decker peanut butter and jelly sandwich. When I took the first bite, I knew.

Most days, I make myself two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I take out four slices of bread, I squirt jelly on two slices and spread peanut butter on the other two, smush them together and there’s two Heaven sent sandwiches. Until one day, the sandwich landscape changed forever.

As I opened my bread, I noticed just three slices left. Not knowing what to do, I took them out and placed them on my plate. The plan was to put jelly on one slice, peanut butter on the other and with the third slice, I had planned to spread jelly on the top half and peanut butter on the bottom half and then just fold it over. That way, I would have a sandwich and a half.

Next thing I knew, I was staring at two slices of bread with jelly spread all over them and one with peanut butter.

That is when the magic happened.

I quickly threw the slice of bread with peanut butter on it together with one of the jelly slices. On top of this sandwich, I threw another layer of peanut butter. Then, I placed the final piece of bread with the jelly.

I took a step back in amazement of my magical creation. I had conceived my very own triple decker peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I gently picked up the delicacy and held it up to the sky similar to the way Simba was held up in “The Lion King.” The sandwich began to glow gold while my jealous belly began to rumble like a rupturing volcano.

The sandwich was perfect, but it needed an equally awesome side dish. Nacho Cheese Doritos began calling my name from the cabinet. I put triple the serving size on my plate and I was ready to munch.

After marveling at my masterpiece for a good half hour, I decided to go in for the kill. I took a bite and before I even began chewing, the flavor of a thousand lifetimes of bread, peanut butter and jelly filled my mouth.

Flavors were oozing out of the bread and fighting vigorously over the real estate of my taste buds. My pupils dilated and as I chewed, my eyes began to water from the delectable taste of my extraordinary creation. My lips began to shake and I fell to my knees.

At this moment, I knew the landscape of sandwiches had changed forever.

I pulled myself together and decided I should spread the good news. I took a picture of the divinity and posted it to Hilltopmadness on Snapchat. That is when the war broke out.

Friends turned into foes all over the true definition of a triple decker sandwich.

Did triple refer to the layers of bread or layers of substance between?

I say layers of bread, but to each his own. Either way, such passion arose over such a simple delicacy.

So throw me in the history books under the same category as Thomas Edison, Alexander Graham Bell and Henry Ford. We are all men who have helped changed the course of history forever with one simple idea

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