BOOM … and just like that, millions of hearts were shattered by two handsome, British men. Just in time for Valentine’s Day, naturally.
If you were planning on “dancing in the dark” with Ed Sheeran “between your arms,” you might need to find a last-minute substitute, because our redheaded master of melody is now engaged.
Rumor has it Sheeran alluded to his proposal in his recent collaboration with Taylor Swift prior to the announcement of his engagement in the song “End Game.” He raps, “This end game is the one, with four words on the tip of my tongue.”
Hopefully, this event in Ed’s life will only inspire a magical post-marriage album and endless serenades, despite the fact that now we’ll all know who he’s actually singing about. I can only wonder how that will work out though with the only possible album name left being “Subtraction.”
Not as recent, but just as alarming, another British ginger has been swept away right before our eager eyes. Prince Harry is also off the market. If you were planning on finessing your way into the royal family, unfortunately those opportunities are gone. There is zero possibility for a “Prince & Me” sequel until George is of age.
Prince Harry proposed to actress Meghan Markle in October in the cutest not-so-royal way. Apparently the couple was trying to roast a chicken together when the prince got down on one knee. Wow, how cute, they make their own dinners, just like you and me.
The royal wedding will take place in April, and we can already guess how boujee this event will be considering their estimated budget is $34 million.
But after years of Sheeran’s sweet songs and Prince Harry memes, it pains me to eliminate more potential suitors from the single population to fantasize about.
Let’s face it, there’s no one better out there than Harry, and that’s before adding the “prince” factor. As for Sheeran, over 7 billion people have to live with the fact that their future partner will never be as romantic as him.
However, as long as Tom Holland, Theo James and Dev Patel remain on the market for a while longer, I think we will survive.
